The Five Worst Things About Being a Mom
I will never forget the night I found out I was pregnant with my first child. My first divorce was almost finalized, and I had just begun dating again.
Scott and I dated when I was 15, and we’d never stopped being friends. We’d been seeing each other for two weeks and were just getting to know each other again.
One night, I’d just finished my shift at work, and my supervisor and co-worker convinced me I might be pregnant because I kept having to go to the bathroom. Well, duh, I was drinking Diet Coke like crazy; that stuff flows right through you (pun intended).
I thought they were crazy!
Scott was waiting to pick me up, but I told him I was going to go hang out with my friend, and I’d be at his house later. Hindsight is 20/20…
I didn’t realize that he would think I was running off to meet some other guy. Furthermore, I should have included him in the moment… but I was scared. Actually, I was absolutely terrified.
I was 19, divorcing my first husband, and was a cashier at a grocery store. I couldn’t begin to count the cards stacked against me?
When I saw that ‘plus’ sign…I slowly sat down on my friend’s floor. How in the HELL did I get pregnant??
Ok, dumb question. I know HOW I got pregnant, but this was impossible…right?
Nine months later, I was in the worst pain that I’d ever experienced. After two and a half hours (yes, I know I had it easy compared to some), out came this THING. They put it on my belly and I seriously said “What is that?” Not one of my finer moments.
I knew I’d been pregnant, and there was something moving around inside me, but somehow it didn’t dawn on me that an actual BABY was going to come out.
All of a sudden, it dawned on me that this THING was a BABY, and this BABY was my DAUGHTER. I was a MOM!
I read every parenting magazine and book I could find. This parenting thing was going to be easy, all I had to do was love this girl with all of my heart and soul, and everything would be fine.
We wouldn’t go through the teen angst because I wouldn’t ignore her like my mom did me. I would listen and celebrate every milestone, and would support her every day of her life.
Then, life happened!
I found out there are horrible things about being a mom.
Here are the Five Worst Things About Being a Mom
Worst Think #1: You will cease to have an identity
Your heart takes over and envelops your child in the most powerful love. Moms find the greatest joy in their children and their minds and spirits become wholly involved in making their children happy and safe. They work hard to protect their children (even when their children don’t see it that way). I was no longer, and didn’t desire to be, Michelle anymore. My name was Mommy.
Worst Thing #2: Sleep will become a distant memory
Waking and sleeping when you want will never happen again…at least until your children move out. It’s not only because your baby will wake up every hour on the hour, it happens even when they sleep through the night.
Every sound, and every movement, will wake you. The protective Momma Bear in you takes over. A branch scrapes against the window, and you jump up with your nunchucks ready to kick some booty.
Worth Thing #3: You will cry…a LOT
I cried when I got pregnant with my second daughter, because I thought my older daughter would hate me for bringing another child into the house (she was two). Irrational, I know.
When I had to buy my oldest daughter big-girl socks, instead of the ones in the baby section, I bawled my eyes out in the middle of Target.
You would think that I’d get used to it, since I have six children, but I’ve cried every single first day of Kindergarten. Seeing them grow up never gets easier.
Scott and I walked into the church the day my oldest daughter graduated from 5th grade. The school showed pictures of the students throughout the year on the projection screen…and Lee Ann Womack’s “I Hope You Dance” was playing on the speakers…. I cried so hard that I got dehydrated.
It doesn’t stop as they get older. When my older two children graduated high school, I was a mess.
Worst Thing #4: You will second-guess every move you make
I wanted to be a fair, but fun mom. My kids completed chores, and were expected to complete homework…but we also played in the rain together. It was SO much fun…but, damn, am I going to cause them to get sick?
When I had to make the decision to let them live with their dad, it was excruciating. The pain was beyond intense, and I went through a really dark time. Fortunately, I hid it pretty well and very few people knew how bad it was for me.
I worried every day (well, I still do) that I’d made the wrong decision. It was what they wanted (Daddy wasn’t as strict as I was), and they would have both my ex-husband and his wife. At the time, it was just me. I had no back-up…at all.
I tried to be rational. My company was cutting our hours, and I was losing my house and my vehicle.
Obviously, not every mom will go through the same situation, but you wonder if you messed the kids up because you have to work outside the home. You wonder if you contribute to their therapy every time you discipline them for not putting their clothes in the hamper.
OMG…are you going to be the reason they get cancer when they’re 90 because you just fed them a pop-tart? Quick…give them a banana to counteract the effects (yep…been there).
Worst Thing #5: Your kids will tell you they hate you
If your children never tell you they hate you, than you’re not a good parent. Children need support, love, and affection…but they also need boundaries, rules, and discipline. They must be assigned chores, and must complete their homework.
If you remember adolescence at all, then you will remember that kids don’t like boundaries, rules, and discipline…and they hate chores and homework.
Since, children are not as emotionally mature as adults (well, most adults), they will get angry. When they get angry, they will act out. Every one of my children, including the super adorable 6-year old and the 15-year old Momma’s boy, have at one point told me they hate me.
It sucks… but then they get over it.
The most precious statement that I’ve ever heard in my entire life… the one that literally made me cry great big tears of joy, was “Mommy, I wish I would have listened to you.”