Mom-Guilt on Mothers’ Day
According to History.com, Mothers’ Day was created in 1908 by Anna Jarvis and then became a holiday in the United States in 1914. However, she was disappointed in how materialistic the holiday became and sought to remove it.
Mother’s Day is the one time a year that families give thanks for the hard work Moms do every day. Our families shower us with love, flowers, gifts, and free meals. Our children make handmade cards from school, and are so proud to deliver them to us.
For weeks, I’ve seen the “World’s Greatest Mom” coffee mugs and the plush, stuffed animals lined up on the shelves (in EVERY store), and the advertisements encouraging you to buy the beautiful diamond bracelets so your mother will know how special she is.
I HATE Mothers’ Day.
I don’t feel more appreciated, and I don’t need flowers and gifts. Furthermore, waiting two hours to get a free meal from a restaurant (especially since we still have to pay for the rest of the family) does NOT appeal to me.
Flowers die, and gifts contribute to the clutter we have spent hours on Pinterest trying to learn how to reduce. I don’t need ANYTHING material to thank me for my hard work. (Saying that, I did get my MIL her coffee mug, candles, and stuffed bear…I’m not stupid!)
I just need someone to tell me that I’m not a bad mom.
Don’t get me wrong, I beat myself up for every mistake I make as a mom on a regular basis…like daily. But, for some reason, I beat myself up WAY more on Mothers’ Day.
I woke up this morning at 6:00 am, and cried until everyone else woke up at 8:00 am.
This is the day I remind myself that I was forced to let my four older children go live with their dad. I’m friends with my ex-husband, but he still doesn’t raise them the way I would. I worry that every mistake my children make is because of me.
Because I work, I can’t go see them every day. I try to do things with them on the weekend, but it’s hard because they have their own friends and lives.
Did I ruin their lives? Do I cause them untold hurt? Will they know how much pain I feel because I don’t have them with me? Do they ever understand how hard I work so that I can make a life where they can come live with me again?
The mom-guilt is overwhelming!
Do dads feel this on Fathers’ Day? Probably not.